27 May 2007
♥ actually, i think i could really get used to this.
I'm definitely enjoying the single life. It's good to let my friends be my top priority without having to feel guilty all the time. In some ways, I think it would be nice to do the whole "commitment" thing again, but at the same time, I know I couldn't be there, like really there, for someone in that way right now. With friends it's one thing, but with a significant other you're on a whole new level, and I know I'm just not ready for that again yet.
Until this summer, I spent so much time worrying about how I was going to fix my own problems that I started to neglect the people I care about the most. I feel terrible about it, and I'm never going to let it happen again.
The last few days have been a little (and by a little, I mean very much so) crazy, and they've made me realize a few things. I guess I feel like I've lost a few friends, one old one and another much newer one, which feels terrible, and I can't help but wonder what would've happened under different circumstances. Then again, I've gained (and regained) a few friends recently as well; whether as a result of loneliness or reconciliation, I'm feeling great about the fact that I'm spending time with some of the people I've really missed.
So I've made a New Year's resolution. I guess it's not exactly New Year's, but a new school year starts next fall, and even though it's still high school, I feel like it represesnts a new chapter of my life. Between the new school and all the other changes we've dealt with lately, I feel like next year is going to be the start of something big, and I'm convinced it's going to be the best yet.
The whole best-year-so-far thing starts this summer. Come what may, I'm going to focus on the friends who have helped me get this far, the new friends I've made, the people who make me laugh and feel happy and who I have a good time with. I'm going to stay away from the people who bring me down, who say awful things, who are pathetic and vindictive and cruel.
I'm not going to let anything ruin this summer. Thanks to my BFFs.
Until this summer, I spent so much time worrying about how I was going to fix my own problems that I started to neglect the people I care about the most. I feel terrible about it, and I'm never going to let it happen again.
The last few days have been a little (and by a little, I mean very much so) crazy, and they've made me realize a few things. I guess I feel like I've lost a few friends, one old one and another much newer one, which feels terrible, and I can't help but wonder what would've happened under different circumstances. Then again, I've gained (and regained) a few friends recently as well; whether as a result of loneliness or reconciliation, I'm feeling great about the fact that I'm spending time with some of the people I've really missed.
So I've made a New Year's resolution. I guess it's not exactly New Year's, but a new school year starts next fall, and even though it's still high school, I feel like it represesnts a new chapter of my life. Between the new school and all the other changes we've dealt with lately, I feel like next year is going to be the start of something big, and I'm convinced it's going to be the best yet.
The whole best-year-so-far thing starts this summer. Come what may, I'm going to focus on the friends who have helped me get this far, the new friends I've made, the people who make me laugh and feel happy and who I have a good time with. I'm going to stay away from the people who bring me down, who say awful things, who are pathetic and vindictive and cruel.
I'm not going to let anything ruin this summer. Thanks to my BFFs.
5/27/2007
