03 July 2007
♥ and a big fat fuck you to you, too.
I know you're just stalling for time. I know you want me to get scared and back down. I know you think I'm just going to drop it.
Not this time. I've let you make me miserable for far too long, and this time, I'm putting a stop to it for once and for all. Not just for me, mind you, for everyone. For all the people you've already done this to (and who knows how many others are out there and just haven't spoken up yet) and for all the people you're going to, I know it's time to take a stand.
It's time to let you know that you can't just treat people like shit and expect them to sit there and take it. You need to realize that at some point, people are going to stop putting up with your bullying and your lies and your manipulation. For a long time, you made me feel weak, like I wasn't good enough or strong enough to do anything about it. But something about the last few weeks has made me realize that you were wrong:
I am strong enough. I have enough self-respect. I am going to stand up for the people who can't, who are too scared and intimidated and afraid of rejection to put a stop to your bullshit.
So I'll see you in court on July 31st. I'll see you and your lawyer and your mother and the "imperative witnesses" I know you don't have. I'll be there with the people who matter most to me. I'll be there and I'll be the person I always wanted to be, and you'll be the person you dreaded becoming.
You always said you didn't want to be like your dad; you didn't want to cheat. I guess the cat's out of the bag, because now it's no secret that you cheated on me at least three times, and there are probably countless others that I don't even know about. But you know what's a lot worse about you than about your dad? At least his cheating is consensual, unlike most of yours. At least your dad isn't a sexual predator, like you.
You always said you didn't want to be like your mom, because you thought she was manipulative and deceitful and disloyal. I guess you fucked that one up too, because you are truly the embodiment of all those characteristics. The difference between you and your mom, however, is that even when her son in court because he molested someone, she's there beside you, hiring an attourney, waiting in the wings to support her fuck-up of a kid. You, on the other hand, abandon everything as soon as the going gets tough. At least your mom sticks around to support the people she cares about, even if they've just ruined everyone's lives.
You always said you didn't want to be like your brother, because you thought he was fake and untrustworthy. He might not always be thinking the things he says, but at least your brother has friends, because he's not a judgemental asshole who alienates everyone with his ignorant, self-righteous preaching about what's "right" and "wrong" and "good" and "bad." You certainly couldn't say the same for yourself, could you?
There's a whole list of people you don't like. Of people you look down on. They give you a "weird vibe," their sexuality makes you uncomfortable, you think they're bad people because they drink or smoke or engage in other common practices of the developing adolescent, they gave you a funny look, they like you too much, they don't like you enough, the list goes on and on. I guess all those people do have at least one thing in common, though: they're all lucky because they don't have to interact with you.
You're a two-faced, backstabbing asshole, and you don't deserve to breathe the same air as anyone else. You don't have any friends, and no one will ever love you once they've discovered what you truly are. Even your own mother, despite her undying support (which, I might add, is undeserved after the way you've treated her), is ashamed of you. And who wouldn't be? You're a disgrace. You're scum. You're a blight on society. You are lazy and useless and to be quite frank, the world would be far better off without you in it. Quite simply, anyone who doesn't hate you just doesn't know you that well yet.
I wish I was never going to see or hear from you again, but unfortunately your usual self-centered ass-covering, which, I might add, only further exemplifies your stunning disregard for those around you, has left me with another month to ruminate on how much I hate you, and on how desperately I want for it to be illegal for you to ever speak to me again.
I hope you spend a lot of time thinking over the next month. I hope you have plenty of time to sit in your hot, smelly room, all by yourself, with a family that doesn't love you, a "girlfriend" you're heartlessly deceiving, and not a friend in the world to help you get through it. I hope you spend the next four weeks agonizing over the choices you've made, over the lives you've ruined, over the people you've manipulated and taken advantage of, over the self-control you've never managed to acquire, over the fact that you're a fucking sexual predator. I hope you worry endlessly about having a restraining order on your permanent record, about having your deepest, darkest secrets exposed to the world, about the fact that no matter how "smart" you are, your laziness and selfish disregard for everyone but yourself will hold you back from ever making anything of yourself.
You are a pathetic loser, and your life has been worthless thus far. I wish I could say I thought you could turn it around, because everyone--even the scum of the earth--deserves to have the opportunity to be happy. But I think you've gone too far for that; I don't think you're capable of normalcy. Your judgemental tendencies and inability to look beyond your own selfish needs, even when your victims beg you to keep your carnal instincts to yourself, have left you rotten from the inside out. No matter how things go at the end of the month, I can take solace in the fact that I will never have to hear from you or see your arrogant face again.
I wish I could say I pitied you more than anything; and it's true, I do: you are pathetic. But more than anything else in the world, more than any other feeling I have towards you, I hate you.
Not this time. I've let you make me miserable for far too long, and this time, I'm putting a stop to it for once and for all. Not just for me, mind you, for everyone. For all the people you've already done this to (and who knows how many others are out there and just haven't spoken up yet) and for all the people you're going to, I know it's time to take a stand.
It's time to let you know that you can't just treat people like shit and expect them to sit there and take it. You need to realize that at some point, people are going to stop putting up with your bullying and your lies and your manipulation. For a long time, you made me feel weak, like I wasn't good enough or strong enough to do anything about it. But something about the last few weeks has made me realize that you were wrong:
I am strong enough. I have enough self-respect. I am going to stand up for the people who can't, who are too scared and intimidated and afraid of rejection to put a stop to your bullshit.
So I'll see you in court on July 31st. I'll see you and your lawyer and your mother and the "imperative witnesses" I know you don't have. I'll be there with the people who matter most to me. I'll be there and I'll be the person I always wanted to be, and you'll be the person you dreaded becoming.
You always said you didn't want to be like your dad; you didn't want to cheat. I guess the cat's out of the bag, because now it's no secret that you cheated on me at least three times, and there are probably countless others that I don't even know about. But you know what's a lot worse about you than about your dad? At least his cheating is consensual, unlike most of yours. At least your dad isn't a sexual predator, like you.
You always said you didn't want to be like your mom, because you thought she was manipulative and deceitful and disloyal. I guess you fucked that one up too, because you are truly the embodiment of all those characteristics. The difference between you and your mom, however, is that even when her son in court because he molested someone, she's there beside you, hiring an attourney, waiting in the wings to support her fuck-up of a kid. You, on the other hand, abandon everything as soon as the going gets tough. At least your mom sticks around to support the people she cares about, even if they've just ruined everyone's lives.
You always said you didn't want to be like your brother, because you thought he was fake and untrustworthy. He might not always be thinking the things he says, but at least your brother has friends, because he's not a judgemental asshole who alienates everyone with his ignorant, self-righteous preaching about what's "right" and "wrong" and "good" and "bad." You certainly couldn't say the same for yourself, could you?
There's a whole list of people you don't like. Of people you look down on. They give you a "weird vibe," their sexuality makes you uncomfortable, you think they're bad people because they drink or smoke or engage in other common practices of the developing adolescent, they gave you a funny look, they like you too much, they don't like you enough, the list goes on and on. I guess all those people do have at least one thing in common, though: they're all lucky because they don't have to interact with you.
You're a two-faced, backstabbing asshole, and you don't deserve to breathe the same air as anyone else. You don't have any friends, and no one will ever love you once they've discovered what you truly are. Even your own mother, despite her undying support (which, I might add, is undeserved after the way you've treated her), is ashamed of you. And who wouldn't be? You're a disgrace. You're scum. You're a blight on society. You are lazy and useless and to be quite frank, the world would be far better off without you in it. Quite simply, anyone who doesn't hate you just doesn't know you that well yet.
I wish I was never going to see or hear from you again, but unfortunately your usual self-centered ass-covering, which, I might add, only further exemplifies your stunning disregard for those around you, has left me with another month to ruminate on how much I hate you, and on how desperately I want for it to be illegal for you to ever speak to me again.
I hope you spend a lot of time thinking over the next month. I hope you have plenty of time to sit in your hot, smelly room, all by yourself, with a family that doesn't love you, a "girlfriend" you're heartlessly deceiving, and not a friend in the world to help you get through it. I hope you spend the next four weeks agonizing over the choices you've made, over the lives you've ruined, over the people you've manipulated and taken advantage of, over the self-control you've never managed to acquire, over the fact that you're a fucking sexual predator. I hope you worry endlessly about having a restraining order on your permanent record, about having your deepest, darkest secrets exposed to the world, about the fact that no matter how "smart" you are, your laziness and selfish disregard for everyone but yourself will hold you back from ever making anything of yourself.
You are a pathetic loser, and your life has been worthless thus far. I wish I could say I thought you could turn it around, because everyone--even the scum of the earth--deserves to have the opportunity to be happy. But I think you've gone too far for that; I don't think you're capable of normalcy. Your judgemental tendencies and inability to look beyond your own selfish needs, even when your victims beg you to keep your carnal instincts to yourself, have left you rotten from the inside out. No matter how things go at the end of the month, I can take solace in the fact that I will never have to hear from you or see your arrogant face again.
I wish I could say I pitied you more than anything; and it's true, I do: you are pathetic. But more than anything else in the world, more than any other feeling I have towards you, I hate you.
7/03/2007
