17 September 2007
♥ i'm not
crazy, no matter what you say.
You're the goddamn motherfucking crazy one and I'll never stop hating you. I wish this fucking restraining order did more than keep you from talking to me. I wish it kept me from thinking about you. I wish it kept me from thinking how you were my first love and how I can never have do-overs on any of those experiences with anyone else. I wish it let me block out all the horrible things you said to me. I wish it let me forget that you cheated on me. I wish it let me forget that I gave and gave until I had nothing left to give and then you turned around and betrayed me like no one ever could have. I wish it let me have my two best friends back. I wish I didn't have to hate you like this.
This is all your fault. It's all your fault and I'll never forgive you as long as I live because even when I'm happy, all it takes is the mention of your stupid name to ruin my day.
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, and I hope you go away and never come back. I hope your life is ruined and I hope everyone figures out how horrible you are. Most of all, I hate you for making me question myself.
You're the goddamn motherfucking crazy one and I'll never stop hating you. I wish this fucking restraining order did more than keep you from talking to me. I wish it kept me from thinking about you. I wish it kept me from thinking how you were my first love and how I can never have do-overs on any of those experiences with anyone else. I wish it let me block out all the horrible things you said to me. I wish it let me forget that you cheated on me. I wish it let me forget that I gave and gave until I had nothing left to give and then you turned around and betrayed me like no one ever could have. I wish it let me have my two best friends back. I wish I didn't have to hate you like this.
This is all your fault. It's all your fault and I'll never forgive you as long as I live because even when I'm happy, all it takes is the mention of your stupid name to ruin my day.
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, and I hope you go away and never come back. I hope your life is ruined and I hope everyone figures out how horrible you are. Most of all, I hate you for making me question myself.
9/17/2007
