15 December 2007
♥ and you know who that song reminds me of
It's funny how easily I find myself sucked into the past. It doesn't take much for me to start reminiscing about all the things I used to have, the people I used to know, and from there it only gets worse.
It's funny how alone I can feel in a room full of familiar faces. Pretty soon the voices are far away, and I'm there but I'm not, and all I can think about are the things I've tried the hardest to forget.
It's funny how effortlessly I find myself in the midst of a nasty fight with my mother. In my desperation to get along with her, sometimes it seems like yelling is all I know how to do.
It's funny how being angry turns into being sad. I don't want to feel this way, it's just that I'm beginning to worry that maybe she was right; maybe it really was my fault.
It's funny how hard it is for me to just trust you. I know that what happened doesn't have anything to do with you, and I realize how unfair it is that you walked in just as I was picking up the pieces.
It's funny how no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to forget the people who have made my life so beautiful and miserable at the same time. I can't quite decide how thinking of them makes me feel, but that doesn't seem to stop me.
It's funny how falling in love can be so terrifying and yet so wonderful. Maybe it's because I know that no matter how perfect things seem at first, it always ends the same way: with someone's heart or another in pieces.
It's funny how jealousy can change a person. I know you don't want what he has, but you can't seem to help yourself, can you?
It's funny how seeing the people who remind you of someone else hurts almost as much as seeing them. Seeing her face every day makes me feel like he's always watching me. I hate that he's still there, biding his time, lurking in the background.
It's funny how being alone is when I feel closest to everyone. I guess it's because that's when I feel most like me.
It's funny how Brand New was right all along: I feel like my life is full of the quiet things that no one ever knows.
It's funny how alone I can feel in a room full of familiar faces. Pretty soon the voices are far away, and I'm there but I'm not, and all I can think about are the things I've tried the hardest to forget.
It's funny how effortlessly I find myself in the midst of a nasty fight with my mother. In my desperation to get along with her, sometimes it seems like yelling is all I know how to do.
It's funny how being angry turns into being sad. I don't want to feel this way, it's just that I'm beginning to worry that maybe she was right; maybe it really was my fault.
It's funny how hard it is for me to just trust you. I know that what happened doesn't have anything to do with you, and I realize how unfair it is that you walked in just as I was picking up the pieces.
It's funny how no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to forget the people who have made my life so beautiful and miserable at the same time. I can't quite decide how thinking of them makes me feel, but that doesn't seem to stop me.
It's funny how falling in love can be so terrifying and yet so wonderful. Maybe it's because I know that no matter how perfect things seem at first, it always ends the same way: with someone's heart or another in pieces.
It's funny how jealousy can change a person. I know you don't want what he has, but you can't seem to help yourself, can you?
It's funny how seeing the people who remind you of someone else hurts almost as much as seeing them. Seeing her face every day makes me feel like he's always watching me. I hate that he's still there, biding his time, lurking in the background.
It's funny how being alone is when I feel closest to everyone. I guess it's because that's when I feel most like me.
It's funny how Brand New was right all along: I feel like my life is full of the quiet things that no one ever knows.
12/15/2007
