31 December 2006
♥ work sucks, i know.
[No roses by the stairs though]
PetSmart by the numbers:
1 very large: Gas leak in receiving.
3: Number of cigarettes smoked by new manager in receiving yesterday.
9: Hours on my longest shift this week.
2: Employees sent to the hospital by slippery sidewalks so far this week.
4: People involved in our latest case of sexual harassment, which surrounds biting.
5: Number of employees too many in our equine department.
7: Squeaky stairs on the twenty-foot ladder. Which I use daily.
3: Employees with creepy obsessive controlling girlfriends.
2: Employees whose girlfriends [see previous] have personally confronted me.
4: Former employees who ended up at junior college.
12: Years worked at PetSmart by conspiracy theorist.
0: Amount of underwear worn by gross dog trainer. [Thanks, I needed to know that.]
8.5: Months I have worked at PetSmart.
8.25: Months too long I have worked at PetSmart.
PetSmart by the numbers:
1 very large: Gas leak in receiving.
3: Number of cigarettes smoked by new manager in receiving yesterday.
9: Hours on my longest shift this week.
2: Employees sent to the hospital by slippery sidewalks so far this week.
4: People involved in our latest case of sexual harassment, which surrounds biting.
5: Number of employees too many in our equine department.
7: Squeaky stairs on the twenty-foot ladder. Which I use daily.
3: Employees with creepy obsessive controlling girlfriends.
2: Employees whose girlfriends [see previous] have personally confronted me.
4: Former employees who ended up at junior college.
12: Years worked at PetSmart by conspiracy theorist.
0: Amount of underwear worn by gross dog trainer. [Thanks, I needed to know that.]
8.5: Months I have worked at PetSmart.
8.25: Months too long I have worked at PetSmart.
12/31/2006
29 December 2006
♥ *teen girl squad voice* fifteened!
Except this time, we're doing it with song lyrics.
- I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know.
- And I'm here to remind you of the mess you left when you went away. And it's not fair.
- Things are never gonna be the way you want--where's it gonna get you acting serious?
- My heart is bursting in your perfect eyes; as blue as oceans and as pure as skies.
- The secrets that we keep? We say them in our sleep.
- If you call, I will answer. And if you fall, I'll pick you up. And if you court this disaster, I'll point you home.
- Everybody here is fired!
- And if we all went back, I would love you over.
- This time in my life, I was hurt enough to care. I guess from now on, I'll be careful what I share.
- I think I was blind before I met you. And I don't know where I am, don't know where I've been, but I know where I want to go.
- I will tell you one thing: we're better together.
- My, oh my. You know it just don't stop. It's in my mind, I want to tear it up, but it's not enough.
- If I could open my mouth wide enough for a marching band to march out, they would make your name sing.
- Oh, what a beautiful view, if you were never aware of what was around you.
- But while you debate half-empty or half-full, it slowly rises: your love is gonna drown.
12/29/2006
♥ snow day part 2
I know everyone's getting really sick of the snow, and I can definitely understand why. My car has about two inches of clearance, so I can't exactly get out and about at the moment, and I'm beginning to miss everyone quite a lot.
But I guess maybe this is what we needed. We're all getting a little older, and for a lot of us, I think the end is getting nearer. I think about all the people that I will probably never see again after next summer, and some of them I will miss, and some of them I will be glad to never have to think about again. (There are a few I can't decide about.)
It's been a long first semester. Friendships have ended and new ones have sprung up in the most unexpected of places. A few couples that everyone assumed would continue to withstand the tests of time fell apart completely, and some rather unlikely ones have blossomed. We've all gotten used to new teachers, pulled some all-nighters, cried over some especially stressful classes.
Maybe rather than spend the whole break flitting around and being generally social, we all needed to just sit home and relax. Everyone's bitching about the snow, saying "I have to get out of this house or I'm going to lose it!" but I don't think that's true at all. I think it's good for us to sit around with our families and drink lots of hot chocolate and watch dorky movies and read books we wouldn't normally have time for. I think it's good for us to miss our friends and significant others, because everyone knows that absence makes the heart grow fonder.
This break has been, for me at least, the most refreshing in a long time. I have a new list of things to accomplish (I hope it takes a very long time), a big stack of books to read, and a lot of hours to work next week. Just when I thought everything was beyond repair, it's all beginning to come together again.
As it turns out, I'm pretty lucky.
But I guess maybe this is what we needed. We're all getting a little older, and for a lot of us, I think the end is getting nearer. I think about all the people that I will probably never see again after next summer, and some of them I will miss, and some of them I will be glad to never have to think about again. (There are a few I can't decide about.)
It's been a long first semester. Friendships have ended and new ones have sprung up in the most unexpected of places. A few couples that everyone assumed would continue to withstand the tests of time fell apart completely, and some rather unlikely ones have blossomed. We've all gotten used to new teachers, pulled some all-nighters, cried over some especially stressful classes.
Maybe rather than spend the whole break flitting around and being generally social, we all needed to just sit home and relax. Everyone's bitching about the snow, saying "I have to get out of this house or I'm going to lose it!" but I don't think that's true at all. I think it's good for us to sit around with our families and drink lots of hot chocolate and watch dorky movies and read books we wouldn't normally have time for. I think it's good for us to miss our friends and significant others, because everyone knows that absence makes the heart grow fonder.
This break has been, for me at least, the most refreshing in a long time. I have a new list of things to accomplish (I hope it takes a very long time), a big stack of books to read, and a lot of hours to work next week. Just when I thought everything was beyond repair, it's all beginning to come together again.
As it turns out, I'm pretty lucky.
12/29/2006
27 December 2006
♥ i'm on my feet, i'm on the floor, i'm good to go
So come on baby, sing me something that I know.
...I'd forgotten how much I love Jimmy Eat World. Thanks for reminding me.
...I'd forgotten how much I love Jimmy Eat World. Thanks for reminding me.
12/27/2006
26 December 2006
♥ gymbo
I hate the gym. I hate the smell of sweat, I hate the stifled chatting in the locker room, I hate the big macho guys who make me feel like a total loser. The gym is gross.
There are a few things, above all, that I despise about the gym.
1. Dumb girls. Nothing pisses me off more than pretty, stupid girls who go to the gym and are in way better shape than me. Take this morning's example: dumb (and overly makeupified) RV pom carries her purse into the gym. She was seriously standing on the treadmill with her purse on her shoulder. I'm like, "What the hell," right? And then she whips out her little sidekick and starts texting, and the sound is on, and my iPod won't go up any louder, so I keep having to hear this annoying beeping, and everytime LaQuisha or whatever texts her back, I have to hear "Promiscuous Girl" all loud and it's only like three notes before she picks up and I keep hearing the same two lines OVER AND OVER AGAIN. And what really pissed me off was that the whole time, she's running like... a six minute mile without breaking a sweat, the speed of which isn't really that impressive, but which I end up looking like a panting capybara to achieve. Ugh.
2. Awkward battles for the machines. There's always that one machine that everyone is after, and today it was that one that makes your lower back hurt in the morning. So I've done all the other ones, and I'm totally ready to hit the lower back machine of doom, and I'm heading over there, and suddenly I see this guy from across the room look up and start booking it in the same direction. I speed up a little--I've been waiting for like 10 minutes now!--and the guy sees me and speeds up too, and suddenly we're standing there just staring at it. He looks at me, and I look at him, and, ever the wuss, I go "Man, it's okay, you can have it." "No really," he says, "You were here first." "Nah, I say, it's alright." So, like a total asshole, he TAKES THE MACHINE. By now I'm pissed, because I have to go stand somewhere else so I'm not a hoverer (we hate hoverers at the Y), and I'm on like my fifty-second set of calf stretcher thingies. By the time I finally got over there my lower back was sore anyway from all that craning around to see if this guy's done, and I didn't even need to do all those little twisty things.
3. Stupid macho assholes. Okay, so at the Y, you're supposed to take the little pin out of the weights when you're done with the machine, so the next person can just stick it in the little hole for whichever amount they feel they can lift without straining themselves, but there are just SOME PEOPLE who insist on leaving the stupid fly machine at 912 pounds or whatever they're lifting. Cute, asshole, I really want to stare at your gargantuan muscles while I carefully remove the pin from your gigantic pile of weights. I'm so impressed that you're so apt at channeling all that brute force. What a studly hunk of man you are, please forgive me for staring so blatantly at your package, because you are obviously such a man... NOT! Jesus Christ, asshole, take the little pin out. You're an ugly old has-been anyway; no one finds you attractive enough to chat with you in the gym over what you're benching these days. Gross.
That's pretty much it. Man... I hate the gym.
There are a few things, above all, that I despise about the gym.
1. Dumb girls. Nothing pisses me off more than pretty, stupid girls who go to the gym and are in way better shape than me. Take this morning's example: dumb (and overly makeupified) RV pom carries her purse into the gym. She was seriously standing on the treadmill with her purse on her shoulder. I'm like, "What the hell," right? And then she whips out her little sidekick and starts texting, and the sound is on, and my iPod won't go up any louder, so I keep having to hear this annoying beeping, and everytime LaQuisha or whatever texts her back, I have to hear "Promiscuous Girl" all loud and it's only like three notes before she picks up and I keep hearing the same two lines OVER AND OVER AGAIN. And what really pissed me off was that the whole time, she's running like... a six minute mile without breaking a sweat, the speed of which isn't really that impressive, but which I end up looking like a panting capybara to achieve. Ugh.
2. Awkward battles for the machines. There's always that one machine that everyone is after, and today it was that one that makes your lower back hurt in the morning. So I've done all the other ones, and I'm totally ready to hit the lower back machine of doom, and I'm heading over there, and suddenly I see this guy from across the room look up and start booking it in the same direction. I speed up a little--I've been waiting for like 10 minutes now!--and the guy sees me and speeds up too, and suddenly we're standing there just staring at it. He looks at me, and I look at him, and, ever the wuss, I go "Man, it's okay, you can have it." "No really," he says, "You were here first." "Nah, I say, it's alright." So, like a total asshole, he TAKES THE MACHINE. By now I'm pissed, because I have to go stand somewhere else so I'm not a hoverer (we hate hoverers at the Y), and I'm on like my fifty-second set of calf stretcher thingies. By the time I finally got over there my lower back was sore anyway from all that craning around to see if this guy's done, and I didn't even need to do all those little twisty things.
3. Stupid macho assholes. Okay, so at the Y, you're supposed to take the little pin out of the weights when you're done with the machine, so the next person can just stick it in the little hole for whichever amount they feel they can lift without straining themselves, but there are just SOME PEOPLE who insist on leaving the stupid fly machine at 912 pounds or whatever they're lifting. Cute, asshole, I really want to stare at your gargantuan muscles while I carefully remove the pin from your gigantic pile of weights. I'm so impressed that you're so apt at channeling all that brute force. What a studly hunk of man you are, please forgive me for staring so blatantly at your package, because you are obviously such a man... NOT! Jesus Christ, asshole, take the little pin out. You're an ugly old has-been anyway; no one finds you attractive enough to chat with you in the gym over what you're benching these days. Gross.
That's pretty much it. Man... I hate the gym.
12/26/2006
24 December 2006
♥ holiday awkwardness resolved.
"It's real silver though."
--"Nothing wrong with that!"
"No... No there isn't."
--"Would you rather he'd gotten you something ugly?"
"Why, no... No I wouldn't."
--"Nothing wrong with that!"
"No... No there isn't."
--"Would you rather he'd gotten you something ugly?"
"Why, no... No I wouldn't."
12/24/2006
23 December 2006
♥ and don't forget, extraordinary pets deserve extraordinary gifts!
...I hate my job.
12/23/2006
22 December 2006
♥ bah & humbug.
I am, in general, something of a hopeless Scrooge. It's not that I mind the holidays, but I hate malls, shopping, and other traditional Christmas-season activities involving crowds.
I thought I'd avoid the last-minute madness by shopping today, a Friday, in the late morning. Most people should be at work, right? And if they're snowed in from work, they won't be at the mall, right?
Wrong.
There were so many freaking people at the mall today I thought I would suffocate as soon as I walked in. I always find that kind of thing to be somewhat bewildering, but today, I'd made a list and knew exactly which stores I needed to go to and what order I would need to visit them in order to maximize efficiency.
Apparently, though, my mission was far less urgent than that of a particularly bitchy mom who was wielding what must have been a 5-kid stroller. There were only two babies in it (that I could see), but the rest of this monstrosity was filled with all kinds of Christmas crap, the kind that made me glad that many of my relatives live out of state and don't even know I exist, and, therefore, don't buy me pointless crap for Christmas.
Okay, so this mom is talking on her phone (a difficult task when steering a stroller the size of a Hummer), sipping an overpriced latte, and yelling at her kids when I catch her in my rearview periphs. I try to merge into oncoming traffic, thinking I'll do anything to get out of this crazy mother's way.
By the time I realize how close she is, though, it's too late, and the stroller has grabbed me. One of the handles was caught on my purse, and I'm being dragged down the main stretch of the mall trying desperately to free myself from the infinitely stinky stroller, whose built-in diaper compartment I seem to be attached to.
Of course, by now, I'm practically in tears from this trauma, and the wheels keep running over my feet (why isn't she noticing?!) and I'm screaming "Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Let go, stroller monstrosity of doom!" and this mom still isn't noticing! What the hell, right?
So finally, she looks over and gives me positively the nastiest look I've ever gotten from someone who wasn't related to me, and she says, "I've got to go, Gladys. I'll call you back. There's a teenager stuck to my stroller."
No kidding, you crazy bitch.
I wrestle free of the stroller's grasp, practially trip over that stupid rack in the middle of the mall that holds all the fake hair ("Hey! Watch it! Lots of mannequins died to produce this stuff, you know!" the guy at the counter exclaims facetiously. Very funny, asshole. Not in the mood.), and run away.
So help me God, I am NEVER going to the mall again. You all better enjoy your Christmas presents.
I thought I'd avoid the last-minute madness by shopping today, a Friday, in the late morning. Most people should be at work, right? And if they're snowed in from work, they won't be at the mall, right?
Wrong.
There were so many freaking people at the mall today I thought I would suffocate as soon as I walked in. I always find that kind of thing to be somewhat bewildering, but today, I'd made a list and knew exactly which stores I needed to go to and what order I would need to visit them in order to maximize efficiency.
Apparently, though, my mission was far less urgent than that of a particularly bitchy mom who was wielding what must have been a 5-kid stroller. There were only two babies in it (that I could see), but the rest of this monstrosity was filled with all kinds of Christmas crap, the kind that made me glad that many of my relatives live out of state and don't even know I exist, and, therefore, don't buy me pointless crap for Christmas.
Okay, so this mom is talking on her phone (a difficult task when steering a stroller the size of a Hummer), sipping an overpriced latte, and yelling at her kids when I catch her in my rearview periphs. I try to merge into oncoming traffic, thinking I'll do anything to get out of this crazy mother's way.
By the time I realize how close she is, though, it's too late, and the stroller has grabbed me. One of the handles was caught on my purse, and I'm being dragged down the main stretch of the mall trying desperately to free myself from the infinitely stinky stroller, whose built-in diaper compartment I seem to be attached to.
Of course, by now, I'm practically in tears from this trauma, and the wheels keep running over my feet (why isn't she noticing?!) and I'm screaming "Ahhhh! Ahhhh! Let go, stroller monstrosity of doom!" and this mom still isn't noticing! What the hell, right?
So finally, she looks over and gives me positively the nastiest look I've ever gotten from someone who wasn't related to me, and she says, "I've got to go, Gladys. I'll call you back. There's a teenager stuck to my stroller."
No kidding, you crazy bitch.
I wrestle free of the stroller's grasp, practially trip over that stupid rack in the middle of the mall that holds all the fake hair ("Hey! Watch it! Lots of mannequins died to produce this stuff, you know!" the guy at the counter exclaims facetiously. Very funny, asshole. Not in the mood.), and run away.
So help me God, I am NEVER going to the mall again. You all better enjoy your Christmas presents.
12/22/2006
21 December 2006
♥ playas, ballsiness, and other random -isms
This particular entry is dedicated to a very dear friend of mine, who, for the record, I miss very much. Come home soon, okay? Until then, I'm writing about something we discussed previously.
My friend Sowmya and I don't especially like most people. We tend to agree on this point, and, excepting a few, our opinions of individuals are usually pretty similar.
Lately, we've noticed a rather disturbing trend: ballsiness, and in some cases, lack thereof. For example, we need to quit our jobs. We hate our jobs. They are not worth our time. But something is keeping us back from giving it that last little push, from just saying "you know what? I quit" and it's called no balls. (Only one more year and I can just go to Fascinations and buy us some, but until then, we're screwed, and not, in this case, literally.)
On the other hand, we've noticed that a few people are overly ballsy. We discussed it at length, and there are a lot of girls out there these days who are willing to sacrifice every last shred of dignity by throwing themselves at any single male who happens to come their way. Now, this is annoying, but we weren't wholly disturbed until we checked out a few gross MySpace pages, which prompted me to compile this handy list of no-nos for every desperate high school girl:
Dear _________,
It has come to our attention that you are something of an arrogant prick. Needless to say, we were quite offended when we heard that you, who we well know to have a girlfriend of quite some time, have attempted to seduce, by our count, upwards of six girls during the fall semester alone. Such tactics, along with being utterly brazen and ungentlemanly, are infuriating not only in that you're such a phony, but also in that by the time you got around to those at the end, you'd already used them on half a dozen other girls. Now, we realize that at your age, horniness is somewhat implicit and that there is little for you to do to hope for an escape from it. On the other hand, it's time for you to exhibit some self-control, because, as we have established, all you really have to do to stay in your girlfriend's good graces (and those of everyone else, as we're tired of you chasing us around practically with your fly open and your hand down your pants) at this point is to keep your member, which we've heard is smaller than average, in your boxer shorts. You are completely and totally insincere, and, quite frankly, we would be more than satisfied if we were never to hear from your sorry arse again.
Please relate our deepest sympathies to your poor, poor girlfriend.
Sincerely,
The Committee to Discourage Horny Losers
I think that should about do it. [How's that, Sowmie?]
My friend Sowmya and I don't especially like most people. We tend to agree on this point, and, excepting a few, our opinions of individuals are usually pretty similar.
Lately, we've noticed a rather disturbing trend: ballsiness, and in some cases, lack thereof. For example, we need to quit our jobs. We hate our jobs. They are not worth our time. But something is keeping us back from giving it that last little push, from just saying "you know what? I quit" and it's called no balls. (Only one more year and I can just go to Fascinations and buy us some, but until then, we're screwed, and not, in this case, literally.)
On the other hand, we've noticed that a few people are overly ballsy. We discussed it at length, and there are a lot of girls out there these days who are willing to sacrifice every last shred of dignity by throwing themselves at any single male who happens to come their way. Now, this is annoying, but we weren't wholly disturbed until we checked out a few gross MySpace pages, which prompted me to compile this handy list of no-nos for every desperate high school girl:
- To less than three or not to less than three? No, silly, it's not less than three! This ridiculous symbol, much like the annoying :), is beginning to pop up all over the place. (I prefer to use a nice, non-traditional :] in place of your standard :).) <--Not a happy face with a pimple and a double chin. The <3,>usually used to indicate affection directed at its recipient, is acceptable when used in moderation (i.e. to a friend when having to leave suddenly or to a significant other when not wanting to type out the more traditional, though also more cumbersome "I love you.") but should not be overdone. It's bad enough to use multiple hearts in a single message, but it's ever so much worse to use them in more than two consecutive messages. Verdict: Keep it to a minimum.
- Censorship. There's nothing less appealing than a clingy significant other. No one wants to be told what they can and can't do, or, more to a point, who they can and can't see. Then again, there will always be those lost-puppy-boyfriends who insist that they're not allowed to talk to other girls when no such rule has been put into effect. For example, boys, your female friends HATE IT when you minimize (or cover up) correspondence with them for the sake of pleasing your girlfriend. Verdict: Nothing says bitch-whipped like a guy who deletes text messages or comments from his platonic lady friends to keep his girlfriend from seeing.
- Dirty looks. Now, everyone's been in this position at least once. When you're desperately throwing yourself at a guy, nothing could possibly interfere more than his attractive female friends stopping to chat with him in the halls. Not only are they potentially prettier and more interesting than you, but they probably know him better, too. But trust me ladies, we lady friends are of little to no interest to him, and, more to the point, we don't want to date him, either. We've heard him make disgusting noises in the shower, we've heard his mother yell at him countless times, we know that his parents are cancelling his WoW account, he pees while he talks to us on the phone. We are not a threat. Verdict: Throwing nasty sideways glances to his female friends in the halls will not only not keep away potential rivals, but will also contribute to your future misery when it turns out that all his friends hate you.
Dear _________,
It has come to our attention that you are something of an arrogant prick. Needless to say, we were quite offended when we heard that you, who we well know to have a girlfriend of quite some time, have attempted to seduce, by our count, upwards of six girls during the fall semester alone. Such tactics, along with being utterly brazen and ungentlemanly, are infuriating not only in that you're such a phony, but also in that by the time you got around to those at the end, you'd already used them on half a dozen other girls. Now, we realize that at your age, horniness is somewhat implicit and that there is little for you to do to hope for an escape from it. On the other hand, it's time for you to exhibit some self-control, because, as we have established, all you really have to do to stay in your girlfriend's good graces (and those of everyone else, as we're tired of you chasing us around practically with your fly open and your hand down your pants) at this point is to keep your member, which we've heard is smaller than average, in your boxer shorts. You are completely and totally insincere, and, quite frankly, we would be more than satisfied if we were never to hear from your sorry arse again.
Please relate our deepest sympathies to your poor, poor girlfriend.
Sincerely,
The Committee to Discourage Horny Losers
I think that should about do it. [How's that, Sowmie?]
12/21/2006
20 December 2006
♥ fabulous.
Sometimes, when you really need a miracle, one pops up where you least expected. This is exactly what I needed. Now, if only I could make my way in a slightly easterly direction, everything would be perfect.
12/20/2006
19 December 2006
♥ *blech*
Finals week always makes me more than a little bit sad. And, according to half the newspaper staff, a total bitch... (Sorry, guys, but you were writing on the WRONG copies.) And you know what REALLY stresses me out? I have three super duper hard finals tomorrow and I'm not even remotely ready for any of them.
Which brings me to my next point: it's really annoying to sit around feeling utterly talentless. Right now, for instance, I'm sitting in Kayla's living room and she's playing her cello like a freaking prodigy, and the most musically inclined I've ever been was playing "King Wencelas" or whatever on my recorder in 6th grade. Also, I'm not looking forward to sitting in front of the history final staring blankly at the FRQ questions while a certain someone (who I think I'm kind of going to miss next semester) furiously writes their way to yet ANOTHER 100%... ew.
Anyway, there was a point to this stupid blog, but now I can't remember it.
Oh! Now I remember.
*WARNING* It's about to get pretty angsty from here on out.
I'm definitely going to miss everyone. Robin's party yesterday just kind of... set me off, I guess. I know people have to grow up and move on, but it seems kind of sudden. Of course I'm going to keep in touch with Robin--how could I not?--but it's not going to be the same.
The truth is, high school sucks, but there are a few people who make it seem better. I started the year knowing I was going to miss two of them--it's definitely not the same experience without Sowmie and Branden--but it turns out there were others, too. I didn't think I'd miss Libby and Katie and Nick as much as I do, and I know next year it's going to be even worse.
What the hell am I going to do with myself when everyone really leaves for good? Robin's staying in state, but who even knows with everyone else? They're going to be scattered around the country, and the only thing that makes school worthwhile is going to be gone.
A few of us are sticking around, I guess. (I don't know what the hell I'd do if it weren't for Kayla and Alli, plus a select few to whom I seem to find myself drawn repeatedly.) Only two days of finals, then three semesters to go, and the rest, as they say, is history.
Well, it's not history yet. I'm not sure if I'm dreading it or if I can't wait.
Which brings me to my next point: it's really annoying to sit around feeling utterly talentless. Right now, for instance, I'm sitting in Kayla's living room and she's playing her cello like a freaking prodigy, and the most musically inclined I've ever been was playing "King Wencelas" or whatever on my recorder in 6th grade. Also, I'm not looking forward to sitting in front of the history final staring blankly at the FRQ questions while a certain someone (who I think I'm kind of going to miss next semester) furiously writes their way to yet ANOTHER 100%... ew.
Anyway, there was a point to this stupid blog, but now I can't remember it.
Oh! Now I remember.
*WARNING* It's about to get pretty angsty from here on out.
I'm definitely going to miss everyone. Robin's party yesterday just kind of... set me off, I guess. I know people have to grow up and move on, but it seems kind of sudden. Of course I'm going to keep in touch with Robin--how could I not?--but it's not going to be the same.
The truth is, high school sucks, but there are a few people who make it seem better. I started the year knowing I was going to miss two of them--it's definitely not the same experience without Sowmie and Branden--but it turns out there were others, too. I didn't think I'd miss Libby and Katie and Nick as much as I do, and I know next year it's going to be even worse.
What the hell am I going to do with myself when everyone really leaves for good? Robin's staying in state, but who even knows with everyone else? They're going to be scattered around the country, and the only thing that makes school worthwhile is going to be gone.
A few of us are sticking around, I guess. (I don't know what the hell I'd do if it weren't for Kayla and Alli, plus a select few to whom I seem to find myself drawn repeatedly.) Only two days of finals, then three semesters to go, and the rest, as they say, is history.
Well, it's not history yet. I'm not sure if I'm dreading it or if I can't wait.
12/19/2006
16 December 2006
♥ fifteen comes full circle. again.
1. Reconciliation is sweeter than I thought. I'm cool with this.
2. Most of the time I pretend not to like you, but you're actually not all that bad.
3. Alright, you win. Looks like I was wrong about you after all.
4. At least I'm not lying to him about it! Now who's the hypocrite?
5. Burned out or not, I'm going to miss the hell out of you.
6. You really are beautiful, you know.
7. I know you weren't talking to anyone. Making me jealous REALLY isn't going to work.
8. You don't give me enough credit. I know what you want.
9. If that's what will make you happy, that's what I want for you. [11]
10. It wasn't as awkward as I'd feared. Actually, scratch that--it was great.
11. I didn't exactly expect it at first, but I really do love you that much. (Even if I wish it was still me that you wanted.) [9]
12. It's about damn time! I'm stoked.
13. Maybe this time will be better than the last. I can only hope.
14. Good thing you speak me.
15. Please don't be six-weeks-ago her. I don't need anymore drama.
2. Most of the time I pretend not to like you, but you're actually not all that bad.
3. Alright, you win. Looks like I was wrong about you after all.
4. At least I'm not lying to him about it! Now who's the hypocrite?
5. Burned out or not, I'm going to miss the hell out of you.
6. You really are beautiful, you know.
7. I know you weren't talking to anyone. Making me jealous REALLY isn't going to work.
8. You don't give me enough credit. I know what you want.
9. If that's what will make you happy, that's what I want for you. [11]
10. It wasn't as awkward as I'd feared. Actually, scratch that--it was great.
11. I didn't exactly expect it at first, but I really do love you that much. (Even if I wish it was still me that you wanted.) [9]
12. It's about damn time! I'm stoked.
13. Maybe this time will be better than the last. I can only hope.
14. Good thing you speak me.
15. Please don't be six-weeks-ago her. I don't need anymore drama.
12/16/2006
02 December 2006
♥ it's getting a little old, actually
I'm gonna wear cute shoes
and I'm gonna do my hair
and for about ten minutes,
I'm gonna think I look great.
And then I'm gonna see them
and I'm gonna realize:
I'm not getting any better,
am I?
and I'm gonna do my hair
and for about ten minutes,
I'm gonna think I look great.
And then I'm gonna see them
and I'm gonna realize:
I'm not getting any better,
am I?
12/02/2006
